It’s so sad that I don’t have any pictures of my dogs because I was still very young and didn’t have a phone when they were with me. They were very good dogs. Lampack was a male, while Runi was a female. She died while pregnant in a field, hit by a car. God, I can’t forget the memory. Lampack ran around her body just after she was hit, and before we could rescue her or take her to a veterinarian, she died.๐ญ
It took less than four months for Lampack to join her. When he was alive, he always rejected food and stayed indoors. I felt too guilty to even see him, so I started avoiding him. On his last days, I still remember how he looked so sorry at me when he was dying.
I couldn’t share my pain with anyone because some people had the mindset of “It’s just a dog!” But they were my friends, my companions, my best buddies, my sleep mates, my dogs, my siblings. ๐ญ They would jump on me every morning until I lay on the ground, and then they would climb on me and start licking me. They were full of life and beautiful, and I only have memories of them, which I never want to forget.
I still feel guilty for Runi’s death, and every time I remember how Lampack ran frantically around her dead body, I break down.
Runi and Lampack, wherever you are, God, I miss you. I’m sorry. I love you. I’m sorry. ๐๐ I’m still scared to get another dog because I don’t think I deserve them. It’s been years, but I just want to continue carrying their memories. Though it seems painful, it’s what I deserve.
The picture is not of my dog but looks exactly like Lampack…